Why you should talk about your Salary

“So, how much do you make?”

It’s a loaded, uncomfortable and deeply personal question - even more so, considering that talking about money has a bad rep: It’s often considered rude, braggy and just generally taboo and off-limits. To this day, whenever the topic comes up in conversation, I still feel the need to add on a “You don’t have to tell me of course, if you don’t want to”. As if my friends wouldn’t just tell me if they don’t want to, anyways. I’m getting off track.

However! We’re here today to talk about why, maybe, we really should discuss our salaries with our co-workers, friends, families, strangers on the internet, and everyone else who asks, really. The problem is, that we oftentimes money is tied up with complex and difficult emotions - shame, success, fear of failure, fear of success - and it’s closely tied to our self-worth. Similarly to our weight it is often a part of our identity, a core part of who we are and therefore, something we don’t like questioned (by ourselves or others).

Different Payment is only due to different skills & value-add.

Yeah, not really though. Rather, it’s often a question of confidence in salary negotiations and conditioning that started from a very (VERY!) young age. Women and minorities are generally (generally!) more likely to ask for lower salaries than their male, white counterparts and more easily budge when confronted with resistance, assuming that they asked for too much already. It’s a vicious circle that we can only break if we are open and transparent about our salaries. We need to know our worth and what we can ask for, when filling a specific position. After all - how can you ask for what you deserve in salary negotiation processes, when you don’t actually know what you should expect? Not discussing your salary has concrete negative consequences, especially for women and minorities, as it generally results in substantial pay inequities. Companies tend to pay their employees what they ask for (or at least the absolute maximum they can if what you asked for is even higher than that). Knowing what you CAN ask for (and that what you asked for is justified) gives you a substantial leg up in your negotiations.

Talking about salary is just causes trouble and jealousy

Again - yeah, not really though. While often considered as “troublemaking” and causing a negative work environment, openly discussing salaries actually does the exact opposite: Being open and transparent cuts down the noise and lets people focus on their work! No more gossiping or wondering about who earns what when all the information, reasons and calculation schemes are transparent and easily accessible to everyone!

Additionally - companies that are transparent with their payment schemes, generally already have more just payment schemes anyway. Who would want to publicize payment schemes that are unfair to their employees, anyways? So when you’re applying to a company and they’re transparent about this topic, it’s generally a huge green flag (not sure that’s a word? Still true, though!)

If you still want to cause some worthwhile trouble, talking to your colleagues and general salary transparency can even help you fight TOGETHER for increased salaries if you notice that your payment is below industry average or even if you feel, industry average is below what your work is worth! However, is it really “causing trouble” if you fight for what should be yours all along?

Talking about salary is uncomfortable, too personal and rude

Having those discussions of “So, how much do you earn?” is not always easy - we’re often conditioned not to talk about it and raised to consider it uncomfortable and rude. However, there are ways to make them slightly easier. Most importantly, keepin mind that what you’re doing will be beneficial to you both, making negotiation easier for the both of you!

Try approaching the topic in a laid back setting, discussing it informally rather than in a strict and impersonal setting. It can come up rather naturally, for example when discussing upcoming performance reviews - grab the bull by the horn, take the plunge and ask the question! You can also volunteer information first, framing it as asking for input whether your desired salary or current salary are industry standard or whether you should aim higher.

Most importantly: You’re not trying to fish around for gossip. You’re trying to create a win-win situation for everyone involved, that results in better pay for everyone, resulting in higher job satisfaction and higher productivity. It’s actually win-win-win, with your company as the third party ;)

Have you talked about your salary in the past? How did it go? I’d love to know!