Making hard decisions: Moving to Austin (Part 1)

Read part 2 here

It's been almost two months since I've made the big move to Austin and it's about time I answer the number one question I've been asked over the last few months: How did you decide? How did you make such a huge decision? Why Austin? Let me start this off by saying - it was a HARD decision.

The lead up

The discussion on a potential move to Austin started about a year and a half ago and honestly? I was not having it. I had just  settled into my life in Vienna, I had community, I had friends I saw for brunch every other week, I was close to my family and I was *finally* in a rather strong position professionally. Giving all that up for the unknown? Nope, nope, not happening.

Then again, my partner was in a similar situation in Austin, so want to or not, I had to at least be open to the discussion. So, we started using all the classic decision making tools. Lists. Pros and Cons. More Lists. SWOT Analysis (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats). Research. Lists again. You get the picture. And, let me tell you, all of it was completely useless in helping me make a decision.

The revelation

Why was none of it helping?! Well, let me paint you a picture. One day, I was at my parents' house, in the middle of nowhere going for a walk and listening to a podcast. I didn't know it yet, but daaamn, did that podcast blow my mind. It was NPR's Life Kit and the episode is called "Faced with a tough decision? The key to choosing may be your mindset" where they interviewed Ruth Chang, a decision making expert and the heroine behind me finally making a decision. She said, you need to distinguish big decisions from hard decisions - because not every big, life-altering decision is difficult (think cancer surgery - pretty clear, we'd all go for that if necessary, right?). What makes a hard decision HARD is that it's the choice between two equally good but completely different options. Boom. Thinking back on it now, I'd say - well, yes, of course! But I had never even considered this angle before! What made the choice between Austria and Austin so difficult was that it was two amazing but completely different options! One was stability, an established community, and family close by, knowing how things worked at my job, wonderful mentors,…  The other was adventure, the unknown, experiencing a new culture, meeting new people,  … Literally opposites.

The decision

So, mind blown. I finally understood what made this whole thing so difficult. However, I'm still no closer to making a decision, right? Well, not exactly. You see, Ruth wasn't done sharing her wisdom! We're learning a new framework called AUTHOR (as in, you're the author of your life, Ruth, you did it again.)

Ascertain what matters: What is really important to me? How do those impact the choice I'm making?

Understand the pros and cons (The lists are coming back out again)

Tally up the pros and cons - can we make a decision based on those?

//Quick interlude - this is essentially where I got stuck initially trying to make my decision. Ruth to the rescue!// 

Hone in on the fact that my options are equal: Confirmed, no option comes out on top, we really do have a HARD decision to make here, folks!

Open yourself up to the possibility of making a commitment… (this is where it gets a little scary, but also, it's the only way, so we keep pushing forward) … and once we made that commitment, we

Realize ourselves as someone for whom the choice made is the right choice, who has committed to that course of action!

Truly, while I can always go back to Austria (and that is the plan at some point), the decision was still a crossroads for me - who am I and what is important to me? What do I want my life to be like?

I made my choice - and while it was still a bit of a ride to implement this decision and make my way to Austin - I'm very happy with the decision I made. I honestly can't even imagine myself having made a different choice - which is really what I think Ruth meant all along.

How about you? What was the hardest decision you've had to made? How did you make it? I'm so curious to learn what helped you!